Should I Take Away Soccer If My Son Isn’t Doing Well In School?

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QUESTION:

“Sterling (8) is really struggling with school work and doing simple chores at home- so we took away soccer this year until he can prove that he can focus on getting his schoolwork done. I feel like I’m a horrible mom and am really struggling with not letting him do it anymore. Is that too far? We’ve just tried everything. He isn’t listening and is being destructive- I feel like soccer would be a good outlet, but I can’t keep giving him reasons to not focus on school. What would you do?! Help?!”

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Community Answers

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

“I personally would not. This has been a hard year. Let him has his fun.”

“I would not take away soccer, he needs the exercise and an outlet. Maybe take away games, computers, TV.”

“Have you had him checked for something like dyslexia or ADD?? I was tested in late second semester of high school for tracking and retention when reading. I definitely had an issue.”

“I’m not an expert but have you had him tested for ADHD? A lot of times when kids “struggle” in school it’s because they are bored and the material is either not challenging enough for them or engaging. Like I said, I’m not an expert but it may be worth looking into.”

“Such a healthy activity, mentally and physically. I’ve read that students who participate in sports do better in school. Of all things to take away, a physical outlet should not be the one.”

“I think you gave it a try and if it’s not working or you think it’s harming more than helping let him go back for the next season. I can see your reasoning for taking it away but sports are a good commitment for little ones and they learn a lot more than just the sport. Is he having problems at soccer too? Then I could really see taking it away because you don’t wanna let him be disruptive to the other children. Maybe you can make it into something positive and let him earn it back somehow like everytime you have a good day we’ll give you a sticker and if you have x amount of good days you’ll earn it back. I think he’s old enough to prove to you if he really wants it or not just don’t make it too complicated.”

“I don’t think that punishment will motivate him to be a better student. If he doesn’t have an outlet, it may actually make things worse. I would be more concerned with finding out why he is struggling so much. He could have a learning disability or there could be social problems at school, maybe he is depressed (yes, it can happen in young children and it often makes a difference to grades).”

“My son could no longer participate in football because he couldn’t pass Algebra class. It was downhill from there. I would not take away his sports.”

“DO NOT take away his soccer. Everyone needs an outlet and if you stop that he will harbor feeling of anger and resentment towards you. It may be a good idea to have him tested for learning disabilities and ADHD as well as ODD.”

“Maybe he is truly having a hard time at school & could use you to help him & understand him so he can do better. Some kids don’t know how to ask for help when it’s needed.”

“I think everybody is having trouble in school right now this whole past year has been horrible and doing chores kids no kids I know of likes doing that but if soccer is something that he really gets into and does good at I would let him do it and see if he can get together on the school work and chores.”

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